Ch 2 Rajasthan!
The milectric and the chapraasi
Our nomadic wanderings in India once took us to Udaipur, Rajasthan, where we stayed for a few years. Udaipur had an aura of timelessness that still lingers with me- it almost seemed right out of a Satyajit Ray story....what with its ancient palaces of the Rajputs, numerous lakes and gardens, Udaipur was (and I guess, still is) ethereal.
In fact, my school (Maharana Mewar Pratap School), was on the banks of Lake Pichola and was a part of the palace of the Udaipur royal family! We used to remark that they changed a few wings of the royal prisons to make way for the school.... I still remember being spooked out by the dark, dilapidated elephant stables faintly reeking of centuries-old dung,....
In family news, my kid sister had jst reached the talking age and had quickly picked up Mewari, the local dialect. She had probably inherited my mom's polyglot genes.
It was here that I met my arch-enemy, Anil Mehta a.k.a Pappu. Pappu's family owned an apartment in Udaipur, where we moved in (one of the few modern looking buildings there). I remember that he was the youngest of a family of 6-7 kids- all his elder siblings were girls. I wasnt at the age yet to appreciate this piece of good fortune (that there were so many possibly good looking girls in my neighborhood), so we'll pass over that. And being the only boy in his family, he grew to be quite a spoilt prat.
When he spotted this other kid in his agegroup wandering into his coterie of fawning women, he naturally had to jealously mark his territory and channelised his energies into making life quite miserable for me. The routine usually went like this. He used to peep into the window wailing piteously about how we was so bored and wanted to play. I, being the idiot that I was [Ed: am?], naturally went out. Then he would start pummelling me, wring my neck...the usual bully routine. I dunno if he was threatened by the fact that I could speak English, but he always had this line that he used to say whenever he saw me..
"Main bada hokar milectric banoonga aur tu chapraasi"...which roughly translates (from what i think was Hindi) as "When I grow up, I will be a military officer and you will be an office boy/peon"..
[Ed: Chapraasi is a term born out of the typical Indian Government office . A Chapraasi occupies the lowest rung of the govt babu world- His primary function is to be the receptacle of the abuse from the civil servants above him. When a govt babu takes flak for slacking, he vents it on the chapraasi. In his own unique way, a chapraasi 'spreads sweetness and light' by providing his ass as a whipping ground for all and sundry. He also is: a doorman/teaboy/general office gossip/coolie-(someone had to move the files from in-tray to out)/and the frontman to collect the officer babu's under-the-table earnings, all this, for a commission, of course.]
A funny thing happened when Pappu tried to be sweet to my sister once. She sent him away with the choicest of mewari invective. I think Pappu was quite civil to me for about a week. She is protective of me that way.
Many years down the line, it still amuses me that this kid had to go through such lengths to feel better about himself. But I went out to play with him anyway... It was kinda fun, though exasperating for my folks.
I havent met him in years, but its my fervent hope that his wish to be a 'milectric' officer comes true and he gets posted in the more perilous kind of 'sting' operation... And for all those readers who are dying to know if the other half of his prediction was fulfilled.... No, I dint end up a chapraasi, after all.
Our nomadic wanderings in India once took us to Udaipur, Rajasthan, where we stayed for a few years. Udaipur had an aura of timelessness that still lingers with me- it almost seemed right out of a Satyajit Ray story....what with its ancient palaces of the Rajputs, numerous lakes and gardens, Udaipur was (and I guess, still is) ethereal.
In fact, my school (Maharana Mewar Pratap School), was on the banks of Lake Pichola and was a part of the palace of the Udaipur royal family! We used to remark that they changed a few wings of the royal prisons to make way for the school.... I still remember being spooked out by the dark, dilapidated elephant stables faintly reeking of centuries-old dung,....
In family news, my kid sister had jst reached the talking age and had quickly picked up Mewari, the local dialect. She had probably inherited my mom's polyglot genes.
It was here that I met my arch-enemy, Anil Mehta a.k.a Pappu. Pappu's family owned an apartment in Udaipur, where we moved in (one of the few modern looking buildings there). I remember that he was the youngest of a family of 6-7 kids- all his elder siblings were girls. I wasnt at the age yet to appreciate this piece of good fortune (that there were so many possibly good looking girls in my neighborhood), so we'll pass over that. And being the only boy in his family, he grew to be quite a spoilt prat.
When he spotted this other kid in his agegroup wandering into his coterie of fawning women, he naturally had to jealously mark his territory and channelised his energies into making life quite miserable for me. The routine usually went like this. He used to peep into the window wailing piteously about how we was so bored and wanted to play. I, being the idiot that I was [Ed: am?], naturally went out. Then he would start pummelling me, wring my neck...the usual bully routine. I dunno if he was threatened by the fact that I could speak English, but he always had this line that he used to say whenever he saw me..
"Main bada hokar milectric banoonga aur tu chapraasi"...which roughly translates (from what i think was Hindi) as "When I grow up, I will be a military officer and you will be an office boy/peon"..
[Ed: Chapraasi is a term born out of the typical Indian Government office . A Chapraasi occupies the lowest rung of the govt babu world- His primary function is to be the receptacle of the abuse from the civil servants above him. When a govt babu takes flak for slacking, he vents it on the chapraasi. In his own unique way, a chapraasi 'spreads sweetness and light' by providing his ass as a whipping ground for all and sundry. He also is: a doorman/teaboy/general office gossip/coolie-(someone had to move the files from in-tray to out)/and the frontman to collect the officer babu's under-the-table earnings, all this, for a commission, of course.]
A funny thing happened when Pappu tried to be sweet to my sister once. She sent him away with the choicest of mewari invective. I think Pappu was quite civil to me for about a week. She is protective of me that way.
Many years down the line, it still amuses me that this kid had to go through such lengths to feel better about himself. But I went out to play with him anyway... It was kinda fun, though exasperating for my folks.
I havent met him in years, but its my fervent hope that his wish to be a 'milectric' officer comes true and he gets posted in the more perilous kind of 'sting' operation... And for all those readers who are dying to know if the other half of his prediction was fulfilled.... No, I dint end up a chapraasi, after all.
posted by Venkat at 12:14 PM
1 Comments:
funny, I was subjected to bully named Pappu too...unfortunately he was a family friend's son and quite a few years older than me, not to mention a boy. Thus the results of our fights were usually quite horrific until I learnt the art of being a girl and the advantages it brought (read: ladki ke upaar hath utha raha ho! haha)
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